Seat of Justice
Trilogy
Part One
I was still a young boy when my father got promoted into the office of a chief judge in the regional court. Being his only son, I carried a heavy weight of expectations on my shoulders: expectations to live a noble life. And of course my father was the one to define that noble life for me. “You are very privileged to be born into this exceptional family.” - I heard almost every morning, - You have been assigned an important role to play”. Exactly! It felt like the script was already written and all that was left for me to do is simply to memorize the lines and follow.
Our family lived in a luxury apartment on the sixth floor of a building in the center of town. I could see my school yard, market place and the bar right out of the window; the people were so close, but…
Regularly, usually about the sunset time, my father would call me to sit next to him by the window. I knew exactly what was going to happen. He would look down on the people, shake his head and say to me:
“Look at all those people - drunkards, creeping like reptiles, full of lusts! Their lives are flooded with debris! They constantly trying to repair their broken world, trying to make it better… but it doesn’t work, because of who they are on the inside - detestable slaves! Pay attention, son! You have to guard yourself from that kind of influence. You belong to to a higher class… Therefore you must invest your life in higher matters.” I knew exactly what it meant: to memorize poetry, to listen to the classical music, read sophisticated books etc. “You have been assigned an honorable role in the fabric of history, - he would continue, - and for the sake of your mission in life, you must be different! Be diligent to constantly upgrade and polish your status.”
I didn’t want to play that role, but never dared to contradict my father. The boat which was already launched. I didn’t choose that destination, but actually kept sailing further and further away from the shore, getting used to this routine…
But one day, a little change confronted me with a big challenge.
The spring holidays were almost here… As we sat down to eat, my mom handed me a package. “Go ahead, open it!” - her eyes were streaming with joy and excitement. There were very expensive sunglasses… I carefully put them on. “Look at you! - she exclaim in admiration, - you look even more intelligent with these glasses! I thought of your coming sailing trip: the sun is much brighter there, reflected by the water, you need to protect your eyes!” My father didn’t say a word, but obviously didn’t share the excitement. After a moment of silence, he concluded: “You don’t have to go. You can find other fun things to do. Those guys from the sailing club… What do you have in common with them? And by the way, intelligence has nothing to do with looks, it’s inside. Don’t forget it, son.” The rest of the evening we passed in boring silence. As I laid down to sleep that night, I could still hear the music, coming from the street, I heard laughter and sounds of celebration… I couldn’t find peace within myself. I wished to free myself from all those judgements! Why do I have to always compare myself with others? Why would I need to learn my own value, based on this endless comparison? Would judging others make me some kind of superior being? Those questions in my heart remained unanswered.
Coming to my class after a holiday was another torture. Other kids were all exited, sharing the fun they watched on TV… I would never be allowed to participate in that, in my home TV shows were forbidden as a “low class entertainment”. I wanted so much to rejoice and laugh with them, but knew that I don’t belong there…
Unexpectedly an old stranger entered the classroom. He sat down at the teachers’s desk and explained: “You history teacher is sick, I will replace him for three days”. He patiently waited till everyone settled in his place and asked:
“So, where are you in your history studies?”
“Slavery!” - someone shouted from the back.
“No problem, - said the old man, - Lets go for it.” He took a deep breath and started: “There are different kinds of slavery…” But he didn’t even manage to finish his first sentence.
“History is boring! It’s dead!” - protested same voice from the back.
The teacher didn’t seem to be surprised. “I’m a bit unusual history teacher, - he said with a smile, - I only teach history which is alive, I mean, history from the Holy Scriptures. And if you are willing to learn, it can make a great impact on your present and your future. The learning process would include finding the elements of history in your own life.” Strangely, the whole class quieted down in expectation.
“Slavery… What it possibly has to do with my life?” - I thought and looked out the window.
“Don’t be so quick to judge, - said the teacher, as of reading my thoughts. - Let’s look at the life of Moses.
He was born into captivity, in the time, when jewish people were enslaved by the Egyptians. The yoke of the Egyptian rule was very heavy: hard labor, hate and violence were their living conditions. To ensure his dominion, Pharaoh established a system of murder: every newborn Hebrew boy had to be drown in the river! And that was supposed to be Moses’s fate, if not for the faith of his mother. You may want to read the story again - how she laid baby Moses in the basket and launched him into the unknown, then how Egyptian princess found him, favored him and adopted him… And here we see Moses, a Hebrew, who is very different from the rest of his people. He didn’t just survive, he happened to become a part of royal family, a thriving, highly educated man. His life of prosperity was assured, with a high position of authority awaiting him. He was growing up in the royal palace, always satisfied to the full, enjoying abundance of pleasure.
He knew that he was adopted into that environment, but agreed to adopt that environment within himself as well. He could easily brag about his privileges, looks, luck, exceptional opportunities… Yes, everything in his life was pulling him away from his original identity, but one day he made a courageous step and went to see his own people, to actually get in touch with them.
What he found out shook his entire world, confronting him with a choice: to continue in well-established illusion or to be true to his original self. He realized that the world he was a part of was built on deception, hate and murder. All he considered his own, became foreign to him in a moment… But he has grown up, he is no longer laying in a basket of someone else’s faith, simply “enjoying the ride”. He is held responsible for his own choices. He has to act now, this is his moment of truth!”
He paused. The school bell ripped the silence and everyone rushed out of the classroom. I slowly passed by the teacher’s desk and went outside. The rays of a bright sunlight on my face felt like the light of many projectors, pointed straight at me. Like Moses, I had to act in the “now”. I realized that I was a main player, a center and a hero of my life. I am the one to decide and it’s now or never!
“I’m coming out of my father’s world into mine!” I went to bed early and put my head on the pillow. In my mind I was still basking in the rays of the bright sunlight… A flame of inspiration inside my heart was burning away my limitations. My entire world was getting so large - a far extended territory, I couldn’t even see the end of it. “This is the dawn of my real life” - I thought and sank into sleep.
Part Two
Early in the morning my father called me to the kitchen. “I have to give you your assignments for the next three days. I have to accomplish an important mission and need to leave immediately! - he explained. I took a deep breath and answered: “Dad, thank you for your efforts, but I choose to take part of my sailing trip.”
I knew that my answer shocked him, but he didn’t want to show it. He sat down and spoke firmly and slowly: “Son, I perceive that you are being led astray by an influence foreign to our values!”
Then… my response shocked both of us: “I don’t have to share all your values, I can also have my own. I decided to be my own person.”
The following silence created a fast growing gap between us… Mom made an effort to rescue the situation: ”What happened to you?”
“I will find out, - he answered her, still looking at me. - Whoever enticed you to go this deceptive way… Watch out, son! You’re stepping out onto a dangerous territory, out of my protection! - and then added - If you’ll be in trouble, don’t call me.” He took his briefcase and left shortly after.
On my way to school, I felt like a hero. My first victory was already behind me! “I am the ruler of my world!” - I announced to myself and made a triumphant entry into the classroom. No-one seemed to pay attention to the change inside me, maybe only the teacher noticed something: he looked at me and smiled. Then started:
“Good morning everyone, let’s continue with Moses.
As we know from the Scriptures, Moses chose to be true to his original identity. That choice marked the beginning of a new stage in his life, presented to us by another chain of events. He makes his triumphant entry into the world, as a declaration: “I understand where I come from and I will be an honorable link in my people’s history chain! I will stand up for what is right - for freedom and equality!” We can see his heart, burning with high and noble motives.
At the sight of injustice, he perceives his mission in life as a deliverer. Moses is a passionate hero, quick to draw out a sword or whatever weapon he has handy. He perceives himself to be the one, chosen to establish justice in this world. He sees himself as the peace-maker, a mediator… But we also see that others were not convinced of his mission, they don’t perceive him that way - not the Egyptians, not even his own people. They didn’t share his new found perspective. Here Moses starts to discover his inner world: deceived by his own fervor, confronted by his own fears. That discovery led him to quickly leave Egypt, leaving all his ambitions, aspirations and hopes behind. He run away into a desolate place and spent there many years.”
“What a strange story… How come he gave up so quickly?” - I thought, but didn’t have time to find an answer. The school bell rang. “We will continue tomorrow,” - said the teacher, but I was already on my way out; I had to hurry to the sailing club.
I only recently joined the team and was so exited about my first overnight trip! Another guy from my class joined in the same time as me; not that I would be his friend, but at least I wasn’t the only one to be a “first-time sailor”.
We both arrived at the same time to the harbor. Our captain was sitting on the peer in front of the boat.
“Ok, listen fellows, - he said, opening a bottle of Whisky, - everyone has a role. He pointed at me: “Your job would be to observe and to announce the approaching danger. Make sure you keep the whole watch until the dawn, but in couple of hours we’ll get into the big waters.”
Then he slowly scanned the other guy, from head to toe, and concluded: “You’re fat! In case of a storm we will have to throw you overboard as an extra weight… Don’t worry, it was a joke. We will find a job for you, for sure. Stay on the deck and wait for my orders.”
As we stepped into the boat, he called out: “Hey! Are you lost? Over here! We can’t leave without it!” I turned my head and saw about thirty boxes of strong alcohol being delivered to our boat. “Time to go! Take your positions! - followed the command and I went up to my observation point.
The harbor and the town stayed behind, I was sailing into my new life. Fresh evening wind blew into my face a sense of destiny. I took it in with a deep breath. Finally I was in agreement with myself. Finally I found my peace… but not for too long.
Suddenly my attention was drawn by what was happening on the deck. I saw all the guys from the sailing team, as they brought out those boxes of strong drinks with the shouts: “Let’s be merry and have fun!” I could watch this whole scene from my observation point clear like a movie.
“Hey fat one! Come over here! - cried the captain. I got an order for you. Grab a brush and a bucket, go on your knees and start scrubbing the floor right here in the middle.”
I watched this fellow kneeling right in the middle of the party and scrubbing the deck… and felt sorry for him. They drunk more and the the party went wild: “Come quickly! Scrub over here, then over here, then over here! Come on, Hurry up! Your job is to obey the orders.”- They literally pushed him around with his brush and the bucket…
“This is fun!” - shouted the captain, but what I saw was a terrible humiliation. I couldn’t watch it anymore and could’t ignore it either. My only option was to leave my observation point and go down there to stand up for justice.
I stood in their midst and exclaimed: “Why are you doing this? He has rights just like everyone else! It’s not fair!”
The captain got up slowly, rolling up his sleeves: “Who put you here in authority? Are you a judge here on the boat?!”
He came closer and pushed me. I held my balance, getting ready for a fight. Instead he turned around and announced to everyone: “No point to mess up with this one. He is a brain-washed coward.”
At this moment I got everyone’s attention. What will be my answer? I paused for a moment…
Suddenly a loud cry “Danger!” pierced the silence and the scene changed in half second. It was the action time. As drunk as they were, two of them run to the rudder, in attempts to steer away from the rocks right in front of us… but it was too late. From the first hit the boat tilted and got everyone soaked. But the second hit was a shock that threw everyone on the floor. The fat guy landed right next to me.
“Pump the water quickly, you idiots! Team work!” - yelled one of the sailors. But in spite of our efforts, the water kept flooding the boat; we were obviously sinking.
“It’s all because of you! - shouted the fat guy, pointing at me, - it was your job to announce the danger ahead of time! You have brought upon us this disaster!”
“Prepare to leave the boat immediately!” - resounded the order of the captain.
I watched others grabbing life jackets and jumping overboard. I saw the guys from the sailing team swimming towards the shore. It was quite a distance. How long it would take me?
“Your observation is no longer needed!” -I heard an angry voice behind me and got pushed off the boat.
The fat fellow was floating right next to me. “If it would not be for you, I would have stayed alive! Then he added: I’m not a good swimmer.”
“Stop playing a fool! - I shouted at him, - Use your survival instinct! You’ll make it, plus you have a life jacket on!”
“No, it’s too far for me to swim, - he persisted, - I stay here.”
The water was pretty cold and we both started coughing… “It’s’ not a time for a strike, I must keep moving!” - I thought and announced my decision: “I don’t know about you, but my survival instinct tells me to swim. You join me?” “No, I cannot trust you anymore. I choose to wait for the rescue team”. - He answered and looked away.
I started swimming into the night, wondering if I ever going to see another dawn…
Part Three
I woke up in a big, open, strange looking place, being chained to a pole, which stood right in the middle. The clamoring crowd was pressing into me from every side. At my feet I saw a pile of wood, ready to be burned. It looked terrifying… Am I about to be executed? What did I do?!? As an answer to my thoughts, I’ve heard yelling from the rioting crowd:
“He is the corruption personified! He must be executed!”
“Slaughter him like an animal!”
“Burn him alive and let his name be forgotten!”
Suddenly it became very quiet, as a man, dressed in a long black robe lifted up the scale, which he held in his hand. “Let justice be done!” - He announced. Upon his words riot grew even wilder; one of the men approached and kindled the fire under my feet. I screamed, terrified… and immediately felt a touch of someone’s hand on my forehead.
“I’m glad you’re waking up, - said the doctor, sitting on the edge of my bed, - but you’re still coming out of the shock. Take it easy, boy!”
I wanted to ask this doctor so many questions, but he was already gone. I looked around the room and noticed a fellow, laying in the bed next to me; his head was all bandaged and he had casts on different parts of his body. “Welcome to our broken world” - was his greeting. - I’ve heard you survived a boat crush… You got off easy! you could have been completely paralyzed! You should rejoice!”
“Yea…” - I wasn’t convinced by his conclusion.
Simply laying there in silence was boring. “You want to know how it happened? - he didn’t wait for me to ask. - I saw an injustice and got involved… This is the result!”
I slightly nodded my head, but really wasn’t in a mood to hear the details. But he didn’t care, he wanted to talk:
“Sooner or later everyone needs to learn that people aren’t interested in a change. This world isn’t made for freedom. It’s much better to stay hidden in a desolate place somewhere and live in peace, minding your own little business: work, love, raising kids, without asking too many questions. Trust me, I’ve learned it the hard way.”
His words brought me back into my classroom and I remembered Moses’s story. “I wonder what happened to Moses?” - I thought out loud and suddenly saw the old man, who was replacing my history teacher! He was standing at the door of our room!
“I didn’t want you to miss the next lesson”, - he said with a smile and sat down next to my bed. I was astonished to see him. “How did you know I’m here? How did you find me? Who told you?… Wait, did you come all the way just to give me next history lesson? Just for me, personally?” - I was overwhelmed.
“Relax, you need peace right now. I will answer all of your questions, but one at a time.” He waited for me to settle down in my bed, then spoke:
“Your father was very concerned about your decision to be your own person. He called the school and when he found out that I taught history in your class, he made arrangements that it would not happen anymore. So, there wasn’t a third lesson about Moses… but I thought that you might want to hear it.”
“Well… of course, but why me? Do you know me?”
“I know you since the day you were born.”
My face turned into a big question mark, but he made a sign for me not to interrupt.
“We were good friends with your father… a long time ago, when he was still working at the police department. You don’t need to know the details, but our ways went apart because of my faith in God, in the true God of Israel. That’s why I chose to teach history from the Scripture, remember? Are you ready for the lesson?”
“Yes, sir” - I replied most seriously.
“Okay, so where is Moses?”
I tried to move my head to the sides. “Exactly. He run away and nobody knew where he was… for many years. He started life over and was living in tranquility, minding his own little business, which was to tend the flock of his father in law. He loved his wife and was raising his children, living his quiet life, forgetting the trouble of the past… Until one day his routine in the land of oblivion got interrupted by an encounter which turned his whole life around.
As Moses was tending the sheep, the Almighty visited him.”
”But how Moses recognized God?” - I interrupted.
“Oh, the Lord has a way to each one of us! Moses saw a bush in flames, but not being burned up. This strange phenomenon drew his attention, and as Moses came close, the Lord spoke to him from that flame”.
“Wow! What did He say?” - I needed to know.
“He commanded Moses to take his shoes off.” - he started his answer, but I simply couldn’t wait:
“That’s it? Why?”
“A good question, - he answered with a patience of a true teacher. - Because the ground where Moses stood was holy and a new foundation needed to be laid for his walk… Of cause, that was only the beginning. The Lord chose Moses for a task and was about to send him back to Egypt to lead his people out of slavery into freedom.”
“Wow! That’s exactly what he wanted to do! He was exited to hear that, right?” - I felt happy for Moses.
“No, not anymore, Moses didn’t perceive himself the way he used to… He presented many doubts and even asked the Lord to send someone else to do the job”. He saw my puzzled face and went on:
“At first Moses defined his world through his external circumstances… until he found his true origin. Then he saw himself as a mighty deliverer, but when others doubted his mission, he ran away into oblivion and his opinion of himself changed to the opposite. He wasn’t sure of himself, like he used to. Now he talks to the Almighty, trying to convince Him that he isn’t qualified…”
I imagined myself in Moses’s place and suggested: “But it’s true: He saw the injustice and suffering going on there. What would he do alone against all those powers of evil? Shouldn’t he weigh his options?”
“The Lord didn’t send him out as a mere human, but as a miracle worker, having access to His unlimited resources, performing signs and wonders. Moses was sealed in God’s holy purpose; it was like a shield round about him, which no adversity could penetrate. But the most important were not even the miracles.”
“What do you mean?” - I asked, impatient to hear an explanation.
“You see, each one of us sits on the seat of justice in his own heart. Each person constantly compares, weighs situations, behaviors of others, his own responses, justifying the one, condemning the other… We establish justice for ourselves. As long as we belong to ourselves, we will live out of our own judgements, whether good or bad. But once you encounter a higher authority and realize that your life belongs to God, then you will put your own judgements aside and step onto His holy ground, into His righteous judgements and His eternal purposes.”
I held my breath not to miss anything. He continued:
“The world of human judgement is a world of slavery. People constantly bind themselves by their own judgements; but freedom is only found on God’s holy ground, on His territory, in His domain. Rejecting the Creator, the world abounds in madness and deception; but slavery can never satisfy. God Almighty is the Highest Judge, he holds the scales in His hand.”
I remembered my father. “When I will get out of here, I will go back home… and I don’t feel sure of myself,” - I said and I looked down.
“Don’t be afraid, - He encouraged me, - Remember Moses! He was immovable by the surrounding world of human judgements, he was inspired and led from above. This is a life of every true servant of God - a life of worship: a life, when you allow Him to lead you and trust Him for the outcome. The Almighty always holds the last word and His righteous judgements are already shining forth through the layers of darkness, as a dawn of a new day”.